Boozin' in China

The most popular alcohol in China is a vile little concoction called “baijiu”. You know how sake, a rice-wine made in Japan, is imported to and enjoyed in America? Well, there is a good reason why no one on earth imports baijiu from China. Essentially, baijiu tastes like fermented orange peel spiked with horseradish and soaked in butane. No, baijiu does not taste of oranges--just the peel. Baijiu comes in a variety of colors and packages, all of them equally repugnant. It can range from two and a half kuai a bottle for the cheap stuff (about .30 American cents) to more than 300 kuai for the “good” stuff. It has about 40 percent alcohol, which puts it on par with vodka, though it gives a more wicked hangover.

One of the most popular ways to celebrate or commemorate something in China is by having a banquet. Most foreigners who come to China will be invited to numerous banquets. Treating a guest to a banquet in China is the ultimate display of hospitality. Besides eating, the main activity at these banquets is drinking baijiu, although it is perfectly fine to tell your hosts that you don’t drink and to refuse the stuff (you’ll also be offered cigarettes which you can also refuse). Those who are up to the challenge are poured a small glass full of baijiu (around two onces worth), which will be refilled by a person sitting next to them whenever it is emptied. You are supposed to wait until being toasted to drink, but it happens plenty often. Those partaking in a toast will stand, clink glasses, say “gan bei” (literally “empty cup”), and pound their drinks. It’s polite to give a toast from time to time even if you merely say thanks to everyone around. For many Chinese men, these banquets become a game to get their buddies tanked, and many banquets don't end until no one is left standing. This can take hours and go all night.

However, as a general rule of thumb, Chinese people can’t hold their liquor. Even those considered “big drinkers” in China can’t hold a candle to a decorated American bar warrior. After merely two or three drinks, many Chinese people develop a heavy “Asian glow”. At this point, their cheeks flush a rosy color and they begin to act considerably more abrasive, foolish, and loud, depending on the person. I’m sure there is a Chinese person somewhere out there who can hold his own while drinking, but I haven’t met him. The P.E. teacher at my school once challenged me to a drinking contest. This guy stands over six feet tall and weighs maybe 130 pounds on a good day while soaking wet and wearing a heavy coat. Nevertheless, I was excited for the contest. Sadly, after I told the teacher how much liqueur I drank on my 21st birthday in Las Vegas, he sheepishly bailed out of the contest. If you ever find yourself in a drinking match with a Chinese person I would suggest going easy on them so as to save them face and not give the impression that all foreigners are jiuguai (literally "alcohol demon", meaning alcoholic).

The most popular drink in the bars in Changsha is something I've dubbed "whisktea". It's a really weak mixture of whiskey and green tea over ice. It doesn’t taste half bad, but its also lacking in alcohol. I drink it. Smile. And then I find myself a real drink.

I've had terrible luck finding a descent cocktail in Hunan. They don’t exist. Some bars in Changsha offer “cocktails” on their menu but they are overpriced, poorly made, and watered down. I try to avoid them. The only place to get a real cocktail in China (i.e. a mojito, martini, margarita, etc.) is in one of the major cities like Hong Kong, Beijing and Shanghai. On the upside, I almost never have to buy a drink at a bar in Hunan. As a foreigner, the moment I enter the bar, I usually catch the eye of everyone nearby. Many Chinese people are happy to offer me drinks, whether or not they speak English, just for the pleasure/humor of drinking with a foreigner. That's right: Living in China brings you instant fame and instant free booze.